The Avant-Garde Football Association

Apparently, art history courses fail to recognize Picasso's obsession with American rules football. I pulled this label off a FedEx Package yesterday. It looks like a poster for a cubist football team!

Yes, I have some idle time.

I don't necessarily 'have cable'

I don’t exactly ‘have cable’ television, in that I don’t subscribe to cable service provider… which means I don’t ‘have cable.’ I guess I could have just said that. I don’t have cable.

Anyway, last evening’s episode of The Colbert Report was one of the best I can recall in recent memory. Full episodes of The Colbert Report are available the day after they air on Colbertnation.com which is terribly convenient for those of us 9-5 ‘keyless piano players.' Watch it.

Columbus Day

516 years ago today Christopher Columbus discovered not only the 'new world,' but an entirely new hemisphere. Today, over 5 centuries later, I not only had to go to work but I was assailed by a prostitute over my lunch break.

I suppose it is true that no one gets Columbus Day off anymore.

(If you can find a better joke in there somewhere, please feel free to share)

Do The Right Thing

Whilst wandering through Amoeba’s endless array of audio/visual confectioneries, I stumbled upon this simple bumper sticker. Now I’m not especially a bumper-sticker man (thank you mid-late 90s novelty ‘gift’ shops), but something about this sticker stood out to me. The message, “VOTE!” is self-explanatory and not especially exceptional, but it was the raised hands that caught my attention. To me, this sticker calls back to the idea of the American opportunity. Voting isn’t just a piece of paper with darkened ovals and #2 pencil smudges. Voting is the opportunity to have your turn, it is your chance to speak, your moment to be a part of how a system works.

It is easy to get sucked into the belief that your vote doesn’t matter. Such is the status of our culture to complain about the system, complain about the results, and complain about the future, all without offering a solution. The ‘hip’ concept of government dissatisfaction without a better alternative is especially ironic in America. Our government is designed to offer everyone an equal opportunity to change the way the system operates, but is only beneficial when the people make the effort to create that change.

Voting is the American ideal that we’re all equal. Voting is what makes this country the most sought after real estate on earth, it is what your grandparents worked so hard for, and it is what millions have died for.

Get educated, get involved, get out there and vote.

An evening with Eric Wareheim

Last Friday night, in a fashion that can only be described as forgettable, I met Eric Wareheim. For those of you devoid of a hip lifestyle, Eric Wareheim. makes up the Eric of Adult Swim’s Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job.
I wish I could say we met over humorous circumstances or amidst a turbulent dance-off, but alas, I met Eric Wareheim the same way I’ve met other comedy icons nice enough to stop and shake my hand; I was awkward.
I saw him while perusing through downtown LA’s Bar 107. My brain said to do the cool thing, which was to act indifferent while my insides twisted themselves into star-struck knots. Normally, I would have listened to my brain; he is the brains of this whole operation, but it was Eric Wareheim's company that made me act foolishly. Mr. Wareheim was with someone I ‘knew,’ someone I had performed with not more than 5 days prior. I figured I could say hi to DJ Dougg Pound, whom I performed with, which would naturally carry-over to an introduction and possibly a laugh. It wasn’t a great plan, but it was all I could come up with in the 5 seconds it took me to approach DJ Dougg Pound (a proper game plan would have been advisable, but thinking isn’t usually part of meeting someone you admire [see dating]).
I marched up to DJ Dougg Pound expecting him to remember me from the less than stellar performance we shared, which he did after roughly 3 seconds of awkward quizzical expressions. Upon realizing ‘who I was,’ he said hello and without any hesitation turned to Eric Wareheim and said, “I performed with this guy, he’s okay.”
My brain should have identified this introduction as a good opportunity to say something cool like, “how are you guys doing tonight or are they [girls] with you,” but instead my brain came up with “Your show is awesome.” Awesome. I chose awesome, the word that is used in the show’s title to convey humor. Yes, I am a complete and total idiot.
Eric Wertheim was as polite as one can be when a stranger says something stupid and hangs onto your hand for far too long; he smiled and walked away.
Moore, you still got it.

Thanks Jesus

Los Angeles. The name itself instills a myriad of images from palm trees to party girls, but rarely does anyone initially descend upon the city’s Spanish origin without a little guidance. Despite 3.5 years of LA living under my belt, I too am often times surprised when a facet of Spanish culture appears in my day-to-day. I was reminded of this fact upon viewing a Subway restaurant receipt and noticing the man who rang up my order went by the name of ‘Jesus.’ Now I’m not going to make the obvious ‘joke’ by claiming that Jesus of Nazareth exchanged money with me; not really my style. I grew up in the Bible belt, I know the ‘good book,’ and though I have some questions I don’t believe mocking Christ is appropriate. Say what you will.

That being said, it was still strange to see Jesus’ name on my submarine sandwich receipt. For whatever reason, I find it odd that the Hispanic culture tends to use the name of Christ (and his mother) frequently when naming children. I believe having a biblical, non-savior name (Matthew) is difficult enough but I can’t imagine the pressure of living up to a name like Jesus. Those are large sandals to fill (sorry).
In any event, this situation made me stop in my tracks for a moment. I know I’m just supposed to shrug it off and say, “it’s just the culture, man” but seeing ‘Jesus’ on my receipt got me to chuckle on amidst a rough day. For that I say, “Thanks Jesus.”